faevii

I am so going to buy some regular milk products today. If I can eat them, I will have to conclude that what happened was that last year my digestive system somehow decided that it didn't like lactose for a while ... and then changed its mind. Which still doesn't make any sense, but I'll take what I can get.

Once that's been sorted out, I will also buy something with gluten in it - something other than pasta, though, because I already tried that. It'll be my one, final experiment. If it goes as badly as the last one, I will resign myself to somehow being gluten intolerant in spite of testing negative for Celiac, and having to spend a lot of money on food forever. :| (Goodbye, entertainment?)

I am currently fighting two battles in my head, sort of. One is about feeling stupid, which the internet constantly reminds me of because I keep coming across a) things that I just don't understand and b) evidence of other people understanding a thing better than I do. I don't know why this bothers me so much more than usual at the moment. The other problem is ... basically a huge load of envy? I'm just so fed up with never having everything that I need, much less what I want. Other people talking about school or work or hobbies make me feel frustrated because I worry about warm clothes and food instead. And I don't see any way out of this situation. :( The internet seems to be nothing but one big reminder of how much my life sucks sometimes, so I almost want to stay away from it for a while. But only almost.

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