Reboot

Is this the part where I admit that my plan has failed? No, I refuse to do that. Instead, let's just say that my first attempt went wrong and I will have to start over. Nevertheless I'm a bit bummed that it happened as early as three days in. u_u

Sometime last night, I decided that I'd finally had enough of the noises that my bed was making, which I'd recently come to realise didn't actually continue when I was not in it anymore (I'm pretty sure that was the case at some point, though). So I pushed the bed into the middle of the room and placed the mattress on the floor in its usual spot. Then I went to the bathroom once more, drank some water and lay back down. I found it rather comfortable on the floor and listened to calming music for a while, plus you may remember that I'd been very tired to begin with - you'd think falling asleep should have been no problem, but then this is me we're talking about.

I gave up about two hours after I'd originally gone to bed. I suppose I could have only stayed awake for a limited time and then tried again, but in my tired and annoyed state I kind of forgot that was an option. Oops? (Well, I'm almost certain it wouldn't have worked, anyway.)

I will probably not be able to do a repeat performance of day one today, seeing as it's already 1 pm and I need to do a number of time-consuming things before I can go to bed. I don't think I'll manage all that within three hours. However, since I fell asleep on my chair this morning and thus did sleep a little, it may not actually be necessary to go to bed that early. I hope. I guess I could also set my alarm to 7 instead of 6. Haven't decided yet.

In any case I'll try again, whether that's another example of "doing the same thing over and over expecting different results" or not.

Just a short interruption. Really.

Change of plans. I decided to spend some time getting stuff done instead of going to bed ridiculously early. It was probably a bad idea, but then again ... I hardly did a thing during the last two days, so there was catching up to do. I'm not sure I would have been able to handle that tomorrow, if my past reactions to sleeping "normally" are anything to go by. It always seems to make me feel like crap in the physical sense, to be honest. I can think more clearly and have less trouble writing, but don't ask me to get up from my chair! Ugh.

I'll just ... stay awake again and continue as planned tomorrow? Hopefully this time I won't fall asleep on my chair. How do I even do that all the time?! It's not exactly comfortable ...

One of the things that I did was to buy a lot of food. I decided that it was time to move on from being all tentative about gluten-containing stuff by now, even though I still wouldn't say I'm convinced that I can eat it. What if the whole dilemma with the debilitating stomach cramps and you don't want to know what else suddenly does start up again? What if it takes a month for that to happen? It's not impossible, so I remain skeptical. But for now I am going to eat normally and thus I found myself faced with an abundance of ~OPTIONS~ at the supermarket. It was so hard not to buy everything at once! Dairy, too. I mostly walked around with a kind of dazed smile on my face, staring at the shelves in amazement but unable to decide what to reacquaint myself with first. XD I guess I did all right in the end. There will be spagetti later!!

Something funny happened when I walked past the ice cream section. I didn't intend to buy any, but had a look anyway. I spotted a brand that I remembered to be relatively cheap but delicious, and suddenly I found myself missing Daniel a whole lot. o.O I guess we used to ... sort of bond over food? I secretly loved it when he unexpectedly brought home something unnecessary but awesome like ice cream, even though I wished he did it less often because of the money. I actually did the same thing myself when I was the one to do the shopping, though usually with cheaper items and not as many at a time. And then if we were lucky enough to get the chance, we'd sit down with our "special" food and watch a movie or something. It was quite nice.

Not that we couldn't still do this, especially now that my dietary restrictions are seemingly gone. We simply need to remember to meet up for such evenings from time to time. :) He's looking for a new place though; I hope he finds one in this town and doesn't have to move away ...